Balance - State of Harmony

During times of uncertainty it is very easy to let our minds start to focus on the unknown which can bring on unnecessary worry, anxiety and stress. That is why when we are presented with these moments in our lives - and we will be - the need to bring BALANCE in our lives is a necessity.

Balance means brining a sense of stability and wholeness into every area of your life. It brings a state of harmony into your world. Finding balance in life helps you improve your overall health. Balance involves making the time for the things that matter most to us and minimizing the things that distract us from our inner peace.

There are 4 quadrants of a balanced life:

1. Physical fitness - exercise, nutrition & lifestyle

2. Emotional fitness - attitude

3. Mental fitness - focus, learning, growth, self-care, self-love

4. Spiritual fitness - gratitude, awareness & meditation

Focusing on the above four areas will help you achieve balance by bringing to the forefront of your mind to be in tune with your feelings and listen to what your body is telling you. Being aware and making sure you are making time for the things you love (including yourself with self-care) will increase your productivity and improve your overall health, physically & mentally.

Living a balanced life will also aid in keeping your 7 Chakras in balance. When we are out of balance in any area of our life - it will affect one of the 7 Chakras by displaying physical symptoms in our body. For example, when the heart chakra is balanced - the emotions are loved, loving, empathetic. An unbalanced heart chakra - the emotions are entitlement, jealousy, blaming others, self pity, fear of rejection, neediness. An unbalanced heart chakra’s physical symptoms could be respiratory system issues, arms, shoulders, thymus gland and breasts.

Suggested Tips for bringing Balance into your life:

• Make time for yourself

• Do the things you love

• Be mindful of the foods you put into your body (moderation is key)

• Exercise - the body and the mind

• Journal - journaling helps release emotions from our bodies

• Set Goals

• Prioritize your to do list

• Sleep - make sure you are getting enough sleep to recharge and rest when you can

A successful life is all about balance - too much and too little of something can have negative consequences.

Perspective: Fixed Mindset vs Growth Mindset

As we begin a new year and possibly making new year resolutions, we should take a look at evaluating our mindset. Our mindset will either help with the success of our new year resolutions or cause them to fail.

Perspective is defined as one’s point of view of how they interpret an event, situation or person. One’s perspective can either be a block to their growth or aid in their growth. This can be explained through the process of Fixed Mindset vs Growth Mindset. This process highlights the ways a person can shift their perspective to open up their mind for a healthier way of being. Which one are you?

What Does a Fixed Mindset Mean?

The belief that you are born with a set amount of intelligence and ability, and that there is little to no room for growth.

Examples:

• Make validation a priority

• Don't take chances

• Prejudice potential

• Crack after failure

• Unwilling to put in extra effort

• Threatened by others' success

What Does a Growth Mindset Mean?

The belief that you can improve your intelligence and ability through effort and hard work. This mindset is not afraid of failure and looks at failure as an opportunity for learning.

Examples:

• Make learning a priority

• Embrace challenges

• Continually seek improvement

• Learn from failure

• Success comes from effort

• Be inspired by others' success

Change Your Perspective - Improve Your Life

If you find yourself having a Fixed Mindset, shifting your perspective can allow you to elevate your mood and the way you see and think about yourself and others. It can also open up a whole new world of possibilities and ideas. Perspective DOES really change everything. It does not mean that everything will always be wonderful but it does mean that everything can be accepted and dealt with, overcome and progressed from. Only when you change your perspective and how you see things can you change your reality.

How Do You Develop a Growth Mindset?

1. Focus on process instead of outcome

2. Embrace failure as an opportunity to learn

3. Be open to feedback and use feedback constructively

4. Practice self-compassion

5. Live in the present

6. Look on the bright side of things when faced with a difficult situation

Shifting your perspective from engrained belief systems will take time, hard work and consistency. The benefits to doing so will enable you to live a more fulfilled healthier life.

If you need help with shifting your mindset, work with me now to start on your journey to a better you.

How To Feel Less Stressed During The Holidays

The holidays are a time for family, friends, festivities - and, of course, finances. All of these things individually can bring up old wounds or make us feel anxious but combined together they can carry a powerful punch of overwhelming emotions and extra stress.

EXAMINE YOUR EMOTIONS

Many people report feeling anxious or stressed during the holidays. Whether it is feeling pressured to spend time with certain family members or spend beyond their means on gifts - the most important step you can take to help with this is to recognize where these emotions come from. Maybe its sadness, guilt or shame. Understanding how you feel during this holiday season will help you with the next step which is to address by tracing those feelings of where they stem from and then replace them with positive energy and feelings.

TRACE THOSE FEELINGS

Now trace your feelings back to the source. What situation are you reacting to and why? What story are you telling yourself about the situation? Ask yourself whether this story is true or whether it is serving you. Are you judging yourself or the situation unnecessarily? Maybe it truthfully will be challenging but if you do not work on healing or moving past what’s keeping you anxious or stressed - your reality will not change. Shift your perspective for YOU! This is what will help you enjoy the holiday feeling less anxious or stressed.

LEARN TO PAUSE

Try quieting the mind from outside noise from others and their view points or beliefs. Reflect on how you feel when you learn to take time out to just be - be quiet and honor your feels and your energy space. Do what makes you happy in that moment. Sometimes taking the time to remember a happy memory from a past holiday and how that felt can help bring you back to the vibration to attract that into your present life.

Stop Paying to Be in a Relationship (and I do not mean with money)

We all have been there. We go out of our way to help the person we care about by offering up more of ourselves then we are getting in return. We put that person into a category of what their potential could be rather than the reality of who they are settling to be or possibly how they are just built. We need to stop falling in love with someone’s potential and admit to ourselves that they may never be who we need them to be — and learn to accept that and move on!

This leads me to helping you identify and acknowledge you may be “paying” to be in a relationship and then break that pattern. What do I mean by “paying” to be in a relationship? “Paying” to be in a relationship can come at a cost of your self worth, self esteem, increased insecurities, believing you are underserving of anything good and most of all the lack of self-love and making yourself a priority.

HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM PAYING TO BE IN MY RELATIONSHIP?

1. Do you stay in a relationship with someone knowing they are not meeting you where you need them to be but you stay hoping they will change and love you the way you deserve to be?

2. Do you always sacrifice and put off what your needs and goals are and try to help your partner become successful?

3. Do you make excuses for your partner’s lack of empathy toward your wants and needs?

4. Do you make excuses to your family and friends for your partner’s toxic behavior?

5. Do you stay in a relationship knowing it could be better but would rather be lonely in a relationship than be alone on your own?

If you answered yes to any of these questions than you maybe “paying” to be in that relationship. And is it worth it?

Let me clarify that sometimes your partner may need help from time to time and you might have to help them out. But that is not okay if it is always the case with you being the giver and your partner would not do the same for you. They may throw you a crumb here and there to keep you so you do not leave them. That’s a manipulation tactic they are using to show you that they do care about you so you keep helping them. They know what they are doing. Maybe some have been conditioned that way by past experiences and that is the only perception they have of what love is. Let me remind you that a real loving healthy relationship is where each partner is getting an equal energy exchange.

The first step to break this pattern is to acknowledge you are doing this - sacrificing your self worth to be in a relationship that does not serve your highest good. Then you should be asking yourself why you are allowing this? The answers and discovery of patterns that come to you need to be addressed and start taking the steps and actions necessary so you no longer settle for less than you deserve. It will not be an overnight process. You probably are breaking a conditioned belief or pattern yourself led by your ego. You need to start healing those wounds and beliefs and start trusting from the heart space. Make the shift from fear based thinking to love based. Trust that you are being shown this in order to grow and become a better you and attract a better partner!

The Need to Honor Your Self-Worth When You are in Separation from your Divine Soul Connection (Twin Flame)

Let’s start with what the meaning of a Divine Soul Connection (Twin Flame) means. This connection is an intense soul connection with someone’s other half often called a mirror soul because of the mirroring nature of the twin flame showing you your deepest insecurities, fears and shadow self.This connection is there to teach you to deal and grow from them. Basically, the main purpose is to help each other reach personal transformation and soul growth. Read that again! The twin flame connection is there for your own personal transformation and soul growth! With that said, let’s get into the importance of owning your self-worth during this connection during all stages!

First and foremost, the relationship you have with yourself is the most important. And you need to always know your worth and that you deserve your highest good. If you are lucky enough to meet your divine partner (twin flame) in this lifetime, this will be highlighted greatly by challenging you to release all fears and insecurities and learn to LOVE YOURSELF!! Because the connection is so intense, our natural instinct is to hold on to the other partner so tightly and never want to know life without them. But the thing to remember is that the other person may be at a different level of growth than you and may “reject” this connection by returning to what they identify as safe and secure. This can leave the other person feeling rejected, deeply wounded and frankly devastated. When this happens it can make us feel even more insecure and we desperately try to fix that feeling by diving even further into trying to force the other person to accept this connection and choose us.

I want to explain something to you - it is during this time when the other person “rejects” us that they are NOT rejecting us! They are rejecting the work that needs to be done in themselves in order to be a part of this connection. It basically means they are not ready. They have not reached the point that they are willing to face their deepest fears, insecurities and shadow self. So please please do not take this personally. The best thing to do is surround them with lots of love and light and LET THEM GO! Because after all this connection is about YOU learning to love yourself first!

It is during the time of separation that comes the most growth you will know and how to achieve that is by DETACHING! What I mean by detaching is to detach from the outcome and how it all will happen! Once you learn to detach, you remove any blocks that you might have been placing while you are still clinging to force an outcome. Detaching allows the universe to do its work in its natural flow. The universe always has your back and will provide everything you need - all you have to do is ask! Detaching is the most liberating feeling you will possess. It opens up opportunities to come in and fall into place that you never expected. You will be focusing on the most important thing which is yourself. The work you put into making yourself happy will be greatly rewarded because you will be becoming the vibrational match for the universe to provide to you what is meant for you. You will be able to see your connection from a totally different perspective and be accepting of that.

My advice is instead of spending so much time putting energy into rejecting the separation, simply accept and detach! I know it sounds impossible because you love this person so much. But trust me, from my own personal experience that is what I had to do and it was the best thing for me. It allowed the universe to bring to me all the things I had prayed and hoped for to happen and even more. It allowed for divine intervention to take place for my divine partner to accept and be ready to face his fears and insecurities and work on himself. We are in union now but that does not mean there is no more work to be done. We are both still working on ourselves and learning to know and honor our self worth and love ourselves first!

SO TRUST IN THE PROCESS AND LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!! That is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and to anyone who knows you!

Break Free From Co-Dependency Patterns

What does Co-Dependency Mean?

Co-dependency generally means there is an imbalance in the relationship. One is relying on the other person for happiness and approval. Co-dependency can exist in a variety of different type of partnerships such as parents, siblings, co-workers, friends and our significant other. But with regards to being in a co-dependent relationship one tends to be so wrapped up in the other person they end up losing themselves. There is nothing wrong with wanting to care for your partner but the key is finding the balance of meeting your partners needs while advocating for your own needs.

What does Co-Dependency Mean in a Relationship?

When it comes to defining what co-dependency means in a relationship - it is not too hard to do. It basically means that someone in the relationship is often ignoring their own needs and wants and catering to their partners desires. By doing this, you are not honoring your own feelings and needs. You are essentially sacrificing yourself by allowing your partners toxic habits. This often results in the giver feeling feeling resentful, empty, sad and unfulfilled.

How do Co-Dependent Relationships Happen?

Usually co-dependent relationships manifest overtime because one partner’s projection of past dysfunctional relationships they have had usually stemming from a family member. The partner then will seek to control the other person in the relationship through manipulation in the form of gaslighting and guilt.

How to Identify if You’re in a Co-Dependent Relationship?

Here are a few signs that might indicate you are in a co-dependent relationship. This is not an inclusive list.

• You are taking too much responsibility for their care or always cleaning up their messes or issues they get involved in.

• You tend to gravitate toward people who need you. You want to rescue them.

• You are always telling them how to do something or what not to do because you know they will mess it up.

• You talk about your partner’s issues with friends more than your own.

• You do things for them they should do on their own.

• You find yourself making excuses for their dysfunctional behavior.

Ways to Break-Free from Co-Dependent Patterns

• Prioritize self-care! Self-care is not SELFISH! Its’s a necessity!

• Journal your feelings and honor them!

• Start doing all the activities that you love to do before you met your partner!

• Do things that make you feel good about yourself!

• If you need guidance, reach out to a coach or therapist who can help you work through this process!